Insecurity.. judgment, embarrassment and shame we all fear these things.. but why?
when we were little we could go to a store and dance wildly and it didn’t matter who was watching! so when do we start to care what people think, or if there watching?
we all have something that makes us uncomfortable.
I posted a video talking about insecurity and challenging myself to feel like a child again and just NOT CARE!
What are some things helping me to fight my fears?
1)To Start I had a conversation among a group of people i trust! and then continued the conversation in my family, through this i learned that everyone has fears and insecurities and was able to stop and go… WHAT??! WHY ARE YOU INSECURE ABOUT THAT..
of course it is way easier to encourage someone else and reassure them that there awesome.
2.) These conversations opened my eyes and gave me that WTF moment i needed to recognize that maybe its silly to care so much.. i would feel so much better about things if i put my full effort in and didn’t just “sorta try”.
Self-Reflection is so important in our lives! I asked myself..
What is the worst possible result if I make small talk with someone?
How do I feel when I’m sitting in awkward silence?
How Would I feel if i just talked with them!?
Is there anyone I know that can give me tips? How do they keep a flowing conversation?
In the end I realized that I actually fear my reactions being Awkward– so much that they end up being Awkward! how crazy is that!!
I talked to mom about this and she shed some light on how she fought through similar fears! she works in real estate so she has to be good with meeting new people and getting to know them!
she shared with me that she came to the realization that if you ask people lots of questions it gets them talking. They become more open with you and suddenly your having a flowing conversation about the per turtle you had as a child. . . or some other random topic, but the point is that you end up realizing they are just another human being with life stories and interesting details.
look at the thing you fear! that something you want to work on and take some time to self-reflect.
- what is it you actually fear?
- how likely is it that your worst fear will become a reality?
- what can you do to help yourself ease into it?
I am trying to start small by Connection with more people on social media, reaching out to friends i already know and planning to hangout knowing that making conversation will be a part of it! this way i can feel comfortable and hopefully gain confidence in being a good conversationalist!
what is one way you can start small?